Many families keep secrets. I hate secrets. I was born in 1967 in Miami, as the result of an affair. My parents later married, I THINK. What I was told, was that my bio dad left when I was a year old. That he moved to a different state, and remarried.
When I was roughly 17, I asked stepdad number 3 and my mom if I could look for bio dad. That was 1984, back before computers were in everyone’s home. I didn’t get anywhere at that time. Jump ahead to 2001, my mom had passed and even though I bugged her all the time for information about him, she claimed ignorance. Same with my maternal siblings, somehow, no one remembered anything about him. Were they married? Yes. No. Maybe. Don’t know. Don’t recall.
I began hiring places like 1-800-US-Search who guaranteed they could find anyone or money returned. Well, money was returned. I tried another outfit, who at least found many possibilities of relations, as well as possible addresses. Some were in Miami, some in NC and some in CO. Doing more research on my own, I saw a name of a lady who was a few years younger than me. Same last name, at least. Perhaps I had a sister?
I kept doing searches on the Internet. I asked mom’s husband number 1 and 3 (same guy) what he knew. He gave me information that possiblly bio dad was an Army Ranger.
More research…. discovered bio dad had passed away in 1992. This broke my heart, obviously. I had so many questions and things I wanted to say. I would never see his eyes, his smile or feel his arms around me. After a while, I continued searching for more answers. I began doing genealogy research on MyHeritage website in addition to Ancestry, Family Search, Family Tree, etc… I found out he had had 2 brothers and that my grandmother buried all 3 of her sons in addition to her own husband.
I had enough information to go back to the 1500’s on my mom’s side, a direct line to me from Queen Victoria and all kinds of fun and odd history. A city in NC named after one ancestor and yet I couldn’t find anything else on bio dad family.
July 20th I was on Find A Grave website, doing back traces and I saw that someone else kept leaving virtual flowers on my bio dad’s family graves. Who was this person? I sent them a message. The next day she messaged me back. I read it and fell back hard in my chair. This person was related to me and wanted to know if I wanted to get in touch with a couple of cousins. Oh. My. God. YES! and then the most beautiful words…. would you like to contact your sister?
My sister. MY SISTER. I still can’t believe this is real and that I’m really in touch with her. She’s smart and beautiful and funny and is so positive and happy. Forty damn years apart and finally, we have connected. SO many similarities. She’s also a massage therapist (like me), she was born in Colorado and I was born in Miami. She lives in Florida now and I live in Colorado. Her first job was working in a library, and so was mine. She loves reading, cooking, animals and the outdoors. For fun, she races boats… ok, that I don’t do, lol.
So if I’m not on here and I’m late with book reviews, I will get to them, I’m still reading, I’m just, wow, mind freakin’ boggled. And happy, thank God, I have found my sister!